Worse than a needle in the bum...

Over the last 10 years, or perhaps my whole life, I’ve been discovering what is scary for me and doing it anyway. Not tokenistic stuff that I’m not interested in like jumping out of a plane (though one day perhaps), but those actions that seem little or insignificant to everyone else, but are totally at the edge of my comfort zone. Things like awkward conversations, performing a sultry karaoke rendition of Baby One More Time to Japanese karate masters, skinny-dipping under the stars with a dude with a ‘no funny-business’ proviso, and coaching people who are waaaay more the classic picture of success than me! I also recently recorded original music with the same guy who works with international artists like Justin Bieber and Katy Perry. I was in over my head, that’s for sure. But, as you know, that which is scary for us can begin to dull in intensity the more we do it. We become strong, robust and seem to make the difficult appear very natural. Heck, walking into a karate dojo sometimes still makes me nervous. But it’s not my edge.

My most recent self-discovery is that…

 asking for what I want…

something reeeeaallly important to me…

 without immediately and directly helping someone,

is at this point, the most difficult thing I’ve done.

Yep, even more difficult than the time I had to inject my badly injured husband with two needles for over a week to make sure he didn’t die on our pre-wedding ‘honeymoon’.

Not too long ago, I asked my facebook friends to indulge in my music journey by sending me their email so they could stay up-to-date with the songs I’ve been creating. You wouldn’t believe this, but after I posted it (with no emotion/energy in the doing of course), I went back into bed, buried my head in a pillow a cried a bit. My husband talked me through taking 3 deep breaths and then I said out loud ‘It is safe for me to ask for what I want’. Even though eventually people may enjoy my music, at this point I’m asking people to take a leap of faith without offering them anything tangible. That was hard. But then it became ok, and created a lot of meaningful conversations with people I haven’t spoken to ever before. Eventually, the anxiety shifted to become excitement. And then I wrote this.

We know that so many meaningful experiences are on the other side of fear. Sometimes it doesn’t feel like fear. It just feels like the one thing you’ve been avoiding. For many of the people I coach, that thing they avoid being themselves, asking for what they want and RECEIVING. For others, it is a push to not just ask for what they want, but go after it when they have an ingrained belief that destabilisation is a bad thing. (No, it’s not- we rise from the ashes!)

I know you know this, because this has happened to you before. You got out of your comfort zone in a way that was meaningful to you! You performed. You self-educated. You spoke up. You got out-there. You asked for help. AND it created something magical for you. I just want to remind you of that in case you forgot. I’ve tricked myself into thinking that being ‘content’ means that I’m done. There is always a different experience of joy ready to be discovered.

And it’s just a teeny step away.

Tell me about your edgy experiences and why you treasure them now or how they have suddenly become no big deal. And if you want to talk about exactly this, get in touch so we can get you moving through this edge with not only ease, but a sense of sheer delight as what’s to come.

Lots of love,

Becky

xx